The Horizon Zero Dawn Blanket: Oseram Sparkworker

Well, that took forever. Once again, not because the pattern was hard (spoiler: it wasn’t) but just because Life Stuff kept coming up. Life Stuff. Always interrupting my sitting around time. Anyway, this is the first of two patterns for a new tribe, so let’s meet…The Oseram!

RDR2 for R&R

Serious spoilers below, so if you’ve somehow made it this long not playing RDR2 and still know nothing about it and still want to play it spoiler-free, you should probably leave. But not before telling me how you’ve remained spoiler-free for so long while living on the internet. I haven’t seen anything beyond the first season of Game of Thrones but I know all the major beats for the entire thing because I live on the internet and spoilers are like fucking currency around here. If you’ve already played, or haven’t played and never will and want to read anyway, please proceed past the Spoiler Chocobo.

The Horizon Zero Dawn Blanket: Mother’s Heart and Blackout Squares

The HZD Blanket Mother’s Heart There’s a lot of Nora villages, and a handful of important ones where Aloy can pick up quests, but their main village is Mother’s Heart so that’s the one I chose to represent with a square. Also so I could make this adorable pattern. It’s a little wonky, mostly becauseContinue reading “The Horizon Zero Dawn Blanket: Mother’s Heart and Blackout Squares”

The Horizon Zero Dawn Blanket: Nora Silent Hunter

Y’all, I cannot express to you how happy I am with the way this square came out. Someone get the Happy Clichés off the high shelf and just let them unspool around the floor so I can swim around in them and throw them over my head and, just, like, make it rain happy clichés.

The Doom Movie Bitches Want (I’m Bitches)

Peter and I recently watched the 2005 movie Doom. We had heard it was bad. We guessed it would be that kind of ‘fun bad’ where the script is terrible but laughable and there would be awful CGI. Cheesefest – that’s what we thought we were tuning in to. It wasn’t a cheesefest. It wasn’tContinue reading “The Doom Movie Bitches Want (I’m Bitches)”

The Horizon Zero Dawn Blanket: Nora Survivor

On the one hand this took longer than I thought it would. On the other hand I knew this would happen. We took two weeks off for Christmas and New Years, which I had hoped would translate into doing one to two squares a day, but when it turned into totally ignoring the yarn while I fell asleep on the couch watching National Geographic documentaries on Disney+ I wasn’t, you know, surprised or anything.

2021: The Year I Crochet a Horizon Zero Dawn Themed Granny Square Afghan (Even Though I Don’t Really Know What I’m Doing)

I taught myself how to crochet a few years ago because I wanted to make something with my hands. Writing is all I’ve ever wanted to do, and it’s certainly an act of creation, but you can’t put a novel on a baby’s head. I guess you can. The reaction is going to be less ‘That’s adorable!’ and more ‘What is the matter with you?’ and ‘You’re ruining Christmas again,’ but you can still do it.