A Message from the Janitor Buffing the Floor During a Superhero Fight

Look, I’ve got groceries to pick up in the morning and rent is due. I’m going to pretend I can’t hear the hero fight over my cheap headphones and that’s that.

First Day at a New School

I’m starting to think I should make a series of these called Things I Wish the Main Character Teenage Girl Would Say Instead of Whatever Insecure Thing Actually Comes Out of Her Mouth So far, Kate’s first day at her new high school had been going…well enough. Math was a bummer, as always, and worseContinue reading “First Day at a New School”

The Forecast is Storms

Maybe it wasn’t fair, but there were only hours left so what did fair mean anymore, anyway? It was outside a CVS, of all places. Why would they keep it? Was it even theirs? Who else could have owned it? He didn’t know a thing about that sort of thing. As the clock wound down,Continue reading “The Forecast is Storms”

Magnates and Mirrors

Sir Lord Reginald Thwarpington Ramsbottom the third, lately of Hillshropshireforthdanwidthtonvillebourguponavon, was enjoying his morning rather leisurely. He had awoken in his giant bed and rolled over thrice to get to the edge and then gotten caught in the curtains, made of the very finest damask. Once he was able to cut himself down he putContinue reading “Magnates and Mirrors”

Modern Miserable Man

The truth, which will be difficult for some of you to hear, is that he died alone because he was an unpleasant person. It’s a hard truth, so I understand if you need to percolate on it for a bit. We’ve all been raised by movies, yeah? And movies always have those…well, if not happyContinue reading “Modern Miserable Man”