The Adventures of… Dick Dangerly! The Newspaper Nerd

The elevator doors open and I fucking leap out, holding up my gun and the badge I cut out of the back of a comic book and pasted onto a piece of cardboard. “Nobody move! I’m Dick Dangerly! I’m a private eye, and I’ve got some questions!”

The Adventures of…Dick Dangerly! The Dame Blocking the Farmplace

I have finally made it to the San Francisco Chronicle. There’s a lot of newspaper offices in this city – which I’ve apparently lived in my entire life – and I had to crack the case of which one was the right one.

The Adventures of…Dick Dangerly!

I’m sitting behind my desk with my legs up, trilby hat cocked on my head, the light is coming in from the blinds repeating black and white on my face. It makes me look dark and mysterious but is also destroying my sense of balance and I’m, like, ninety percent sure when I try to bring my legs down I’m just going to tip over.