RDR2 for R&R

Serious spoilers below, so if you’ve somehow made it this long not playing RDR2 and still know nothing about it and still want to play it spoiler-free, you should probably leave. But not before telling me how you’ve remained spoiler-free for so long while living on the internet. I haven’t seen anything beyond the first season of Game of Thrones but I know all the major beats for the entire thing because I live on the internet and spoilers are like fucking currency around here. If you’ve already played, or haven’t played and never will and want to read anyway, please proceed past the Spoiler Chocobo.